I feel like I want to get out of the way of collapsing cities fast. I want to go live in wooden houses with my friends somewhere deeper in wilder Finland. Now.
I'm subscribed to my school, which has its good sides, but I miss community. I miss having community with both humans and everyone else, not just either or the other. I'm not sure whether I should wait until I've gathered some more money, and then go live in a wilder place - when I would have a tentipi and maybe a little other really useful gear. Or should I hurry and go now, for example to Sweden, where some of my rewilder friends live.
I'm also a little uncertain about Aimateka. I miss her all the time. But I try to accept that she goes her own ways. I don't know. I asked her if she wants to live with me or walk with me or be my companion or something like that; she hasn't answered yet. If she doesn't, I guess I'll want some kind of lifemate thing with someone else : the one that loves me and the woods most, I guess.
But I know electricity is going down sooner or later. Probably sooner. And when that happens, I want to be with my dear ones. And preferably in a wooden house, in a land I know.
At the same time I don't want to let fear flow over me... what happens, happens. If I get eaten by hungry citizens on a rampage, then, no can do. Suffering and death are an important part of life.
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